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- The Consolidator - 30/33 -
'But were the Justice of the War examin'd, I can see none, this Declaring a new King who has no Right but by a Gift, and pulling down one that had it by a Gift before, has so much Contradiction in it, that I am afraid no Wise Man, or Honest Man will embark in it.
Your Humble Servant, The Man in the Moon.
I wou'd have no Body now pretend to scandalize the Writer of this Letter, which being for the Gallunarians, for no Man in the Moon had more Aversion for them than he, but he would have had the War carry'd on upon a right Bottom, Justice and Honesty regarded in it, and as he said often, they had no need to go out of the Road of Justice, for had they made War in the great Eagle's Name all had been well.
Nor was he a false Prophet, for as this was ill grounded, so it was as ill carry'd on, met with Shocks, Rubs and Disappointments every way. The very first Voyage the new King made, he had like to ha' been drown'd by a very violent Tempest, things not very usual in those Countries; and all the Progress that had been made in his behalf when I came away from that Lunar World, had not brought him so much as to be able to set his Foot upon his new Kingdom of Ebronia, but his Adversary by wonderful Dexterity, and the Assistance of his old Grandfather the Gallunarian Monarch, beat his Troops upon all Occasions, invaded his Ally that pretended to assist him, and kept a quiet Possession of all the vast Ebronian Monarchy; and but at last by the powerful Diversion of the Solunarian Fleet, a Shock was given them on another Side, which if it had not happen'd, it was thought the new King had been sent home again Re Infecta.
Being very much Shockt in my Judgment of this Affair, by these unanswerable Reasons; I enquir'd of my Author who were the Directors of this Matter? he told me plainly it was done by those great States Men, which the Solunarian Queen had lately very Justly turn'd out, whose Politicks were very unaccountable in a great many other things, as well as in that.
'Tis true, the War was carry'd on under the new Ministry, and no War in the World can be Juster, on account of the Injustice and Encroachment of the Gallunarian Monarch.
The Queen therefore and her present Ministers, go on with the War on Principles of Confederacy; 'tis the business of the Solunarians to beat the Invader out, and then let the People come and make a fair Decision who they will have to Reign over them.
This indeed justifies the War in Ebronia to be Right, but for the Personal Proceedure as before, 'tis all Contradiction and can never be answer'd.
I hope no Man will be so malicious, as to say I am hereby reflecting on our War with Spain. I am very forward to say, it is a most Just and Reasonable War, as to paralels between the Case of the Princes, in defending the Matter of Personal Right, Hic labor, Hoc opus.
Thus however you see Humanum eft Errare, whether in this World or in the Moon, 'tis all one, Infallibility of Councels any more than of Doctrine, is not in Man.
The Reader may observe, I have formerly noted there was a new Consolidator to be Built, and observ'd what struggle there was in the Moon about choosing the Feathers.
I cannot omit some further Remarks here, as
1. It is to be observ'd, that this last Consolidator was in a manner quite worn out.----- It had indeed continu'd but 3 Year, which was the stated Time by Law, but it had been so Hurry'd, so Party Rid, so often had been up in the Moon, and made so many such extravagant Flights, and unnecessary Voyages thither, that it began to be exceedingly worn and defective.
2. This occasion'd that the light fluttering Feathers, and the fermented Feathers made strange Work of it; nay, sometimes they were so hot, they were like to ha' ruin'd the whole Fabrick, and had it not been for the great Feather in the Center, and a few Negative Feathers who were Wiser than the rest, all the Machines had been broke to pieces, and the whole Nation put into a most strange Confusion.
Sometimes their Motion was so violent an precipitant, that there was great apprehensions of its being set on Fire by its own Velocity, for swiftness of Motion is allow'd by the Sages and so so's to produce Fire as in Wheels, Mills and several sorts of Mechanick Engines which are frequently Fir'd, and so in Thoughts, Brains, Assemblies, Consolidators, and all such combustible Things.
Indeed these things were of great Consequence, and therefore require some more nice Examination than ordinary, and the following Story will in part explain it.
Among the rest of the Broils they had with the Grandees, one happen'd on this occasion.
One of the Tacking Feathers being accidentally met by a Grandee's Footman, whom it seems wanted some Manners, the Slave began to haloo him in the Street, with a Tacker, a Tacker, a Feather-Fool, a Tacker, &c. and so brought the Mob about him, and had not the Grandee himself come in the very interim, and rescu'd the Feather, the Mob had demolisht him, they were so enrag'd.
As this Gentleman-Feather was rescu'd with great Courtesie by the Grandee, taken into his Coach and carry'd home to his House, he desir'd to speak with the Footman.
The Fellow being call'd in, was ask't by him who employ'd him, or set him on to offer him this Insult? the Footman being a ready bold Fellow, told him no Body Sir, but you are all grown so ridiculous to the whole Nation, that if the 134 of you were left but to us Footmen, and it was not in more respect to our Masters, than you, we should Cure you of ever coming into the Consolidator again, and all the People in the Moon are of our Mind.
But says the Feather, why do you call me Fool too? why Sir, says he, because no Body could ever tell us what it was you drove at, and we ha' been told you never knew your selves; now if one of you Tacking Feathers would but tell the World what your real Design was, they would be satisfy'd, but to be leaders in the Consolidator, and to Act without Meaning, without Thought or Design, must argue your' Fools, or worse, and you will find all the Moon of my Mind.
But what if we had a meaning, says the Feather-Man? why then, says the Footman, we shall leave calling you Fools, and call you Knaves, for it could never be an Honest one, so that you had better stand as you do: and I make it out thus.
You knew, that upon your Tacking the Crolians to the Tribute Bill, the Grandees must reject both, they having declar'd against reading any Bills Tackt together, as being against their Priviledges. Now if you had any Design, it must be to have the Bill of Tribute lost, and that must be to disappoint all the publick Affairs, expose the Queen, break all Measures, discourage the Confederates, and putting all things backward, bring the Gallunarian Forces upon them, and put all Solunaria into Confusion. Now Sir, says he, we cannot have such course Thoughts of you, as to believe you could design such dark, mischievous things as these, and therefore we chose to believe you all Fools, and not fit to be put into a Consolidator again; than Knaves and Traytors to your Country, and consequently fit for a worse Place.
The plainness of the Footman was such, and so unanswerable, that his Master was fain to check him, and so the Discourse broke off, and we shall leave it there, and proceed to the Story.
The Men of the Feather as I have noted, who are represented here by the Consolidator, fell all together by the Ears, and all the Moon was in a combustion. The Case was as follows.
They had three times lost their quallifying Law, and particularly they observ'd the Grandees were the Men that threw it out, and notwithstanding the Plot of the Tackers, as they call'd them, who were as I noted, observ'd to be in Conjunction with the Crolians, yet the Law always past the Feathers, but still the Grandees quasht it.
To show their Resentment at the Grandees, they had often made attempts to mortify them, sometimes Arraigning them in general, sometimes Impeaching private Members of their House, but still all wou'd not do, the Grandees had the better of them, and going on with Regularity and Temper, the Consolidators or Feather-Men always had the worst, the Grandees had the applause of all the Moon, had the last Blow on every Occasion, and the other sunk in their Reputation exceedingly.
It is necessary to understand here, that the Men of the Feather serve in several Capacities, and under several Denominations, and act by themselves, singly consider'd, they are call'd the Consolidator, and the Feathers we mention'd abstracted from their Persons, make the glorious Engine we speak of, and in which, when any suddain Motion takes them, they can all shut themselves up, and away for the Moon.
But when these are joyn'd with the Grandees, and the Queen, so United, they make a great Cortez, or general Collection of all the Governing Authority of the Nation.
When this last Fraction happen'd, the Men of the Feather were under an exceeding Ferment, they had in some Passion taken into their Custody, some good Honest Lunar Country-Men, for an Offence, which indeed few but themselves ever immagin'd was a Crime, for the poor Men did nothing but pursue their own Right by the Law.
'Tis thought the Men of the Feather soon saw they were in the Wrong, but acted like some Men in our World, that when they make a mistake, being too Proud to own themselves in the wrong, run themselves into worse Errors to mend it.
So these Lunar Gentlemen disdaining to have it said they could be mistaken, committed two Errors to conceal one, 'till at last they came to be laught at by all the Moon.
These poor Men having lain a long while in Prison, for little or no Crime, at last were advis'd to apply themselves to the Law for Discharge; the Law would fairly have Discharg'd them; for in that Country, no Man may be Imprison'd, but he must in a certain Time be Tryed, or let go upon pledges of his Friends, much like our giving Bail on a Writ of Habeas Corpus; but the Judges, whether over-aw'd by the Feathers, or what was the Cause, Authors have not determin'd, did not care to venture Discharging them.
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